Ways to Support a Caregiver

{This post contains affiliate links, which means I may receive a small commission if you make a purchase using these links.}

Caregiving is an all-encompassing, round-the-clock, often thankless job. It’s back-breaking, it’s financially draining, and it’s an emotional rollercoaster. It demands that a person give more than would seem humanly possible, and to put the needs of another person ahead of their own, sometimes for years at a time. Burnout is very real.

Anyone who supports and cares for others who cannot care for themselves can be considered a caregiver, but frequently the term applies to those caring for the disabled and terminally ill. While feeding, bathing, and changing a baby all day and night long is a challenge, doing the same for an adult is even harder. Make it a parent and it’s simply heartbreaking.

So, who is taking care of the caregiver? If the oxygen masks drop while in flight, we’re told to put our own oxygen masks on before helping others, and the same applies here. If something happens to the caregiver, the person they are caring for will be stuck in an awful predicament. If you know a caregiver, they may say they have everything under control, but there are still ways you can show up for them and in some cases, lighten their load. 

Here are a few ways to support a caregiver:

• Pick up their groceries or prescriptions for them. It’s easy to stick to a grocery list and drop the bags off at their door. It they’re picky, you can text them photos from the store or video chat with them while you’re there to make sure you’re getting the right items. Of course this is a service a caregiver could pay for, but you could do it for free. Remember, money might be tight. After all, the caregiver is likely not working as much since they have to care for their loved one.

• Give them a break. Offer to sit with the caregiver’s loved one while they take some time for themself. Whether they need to run errands, go to appointments of their own, spend time with friends, or take an exercise class, encourage them to take an hour off. They may struggle to relinquish control in this area, so suggest they start small. You can sit with the patient while the caregiver simply takes a shower.
• Ask how THEY are. Caregivers are not used to anyone asking how they are doing. Their world revolves around the person they are caring for and, particularly if the person is dying, people always ask how the patient is doing and completely overlook the struggles of the caregiver. Validate their feelings and experiences. Take their minds off their day-to-day realities by talking about…pretty much anything else! Remember who they were and what their interests were before they started caregiving and help them connect with that.

• Send them some treats! Who wouldn’t get excited about receiving bacon, cheddar and chive scones or chocolate kahlua scones in the mail? Seven Sister Scones come in so many mouthwatering flavors, but if scones aren’t their jam (pun intended), maybe they could go for some salted caramel bars instead. Either way, there’s something for everyone and Seven Sisters Scones also has vegan and gluten free options! Create your own sampler box or send a gift basket to show you’re thinking of them. Use the code SISTER for 10% off your order!
• Do the yard work or hire a landscaping company. Raking leaves and shoveling snow falls into this category, too. If you can tackle this every now and then or hire someone to do it, you’ll be taking a huge responsibility of their already overwhelming list.
• Help with chores or hire a housekeeper. There’s plenty of cleaning and disinfecting to be done all day, every day when it comes to caregiving. Basic chores can take a backseat, so help with the dishes, laundry or vacuuming or hire a housekeeper to stop by and lend a hand.

• Bring them dinner. Make them a meal, pick up a to-go order, or use a meal delivery service to make sure the caregiver is fed. Believe it or not, they often forget to eat or make unhealthy last-minute choices, prioritizing someone else’s specialized diet day in and day out.

These may seem like small things, but they can make a huge difference in the life of a caregiver. Pick something off the list to show the caregiver in your life you care and see them.